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SEXUAL INTERCOURSE IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP?
Fellas, sex is a subject in the life of young people that's so facinating and arouses the curiosity of youths, expecially the unmarried. What do you think? IS IT RIGHT FOR A COUPLE TO ENGAGE IN SEXUAL INTERCOURSE BEFORE MARRIAGE in a committed COURTSHIP? Is it MORAL, SPIRITUAL, LEGAL Etc Whichever view you're from, Pls share with the house, let's wind up a bit. It's not all about JOB!, JOB!!, JOB!!! There are other AREAS affecting our lives apart from job seeking or searching, SEX is one of them. Share your opinion, whether from a biblical or from a devilical or neutral stand point. Your contributions or views are welcome. God Bless you all.
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@ Faith Yetu, That's Interesting. As Lady, from a SPIRITUAL stand point, Never, Never, Never! Give a man you're not married to your virginity. If he truly loves you, he'l WAIT. Many hearts are broken because God's LAWS concerning SEX is broken. When you break HIS Laws, Your heart must be broken by the guy who is after satisfying his lustful pleasure. A committed/God fearing guy would irrespective of how he feels or is pressurized, refuse to defile his lady and wait until God's government on earth joins him to his woman. As ladies, i'd advice be frank and firm. Never let a guy take advantage of you. When he has seen the colour of your pants or know the capacity of your engine (as they popularly say among their friends), he'd gist his friends how he messed you up and move to look for another virgin to defile. So my sister jobbers be wise, the days are evil. For committed courships, believe God for strength to stay clean and patient until marriage. God help all of us. One luv.
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@ ladidi, thanks. That's was inspiring.
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Nice one Eniola,nice one.I'm a guy and aware that its unfortunate that many young ladies would rather seduce men instead of the other way round.Part of societal decadence perhaps.
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@ chyke27 you are right, some actually seduce men, but the predominant luring/seduction is done mostly by the Men, you know ladies are easily vulnerable to men's advances/psyches, especially when they've been promised to get married to. Ladies give in easily. That's why we need God fearing/men of integrity to lead us. May God help us all. One luv.
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@Chyke27 and @ Eniola, Nice contributions. God bless ya all.
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I give it up for you Enny. It 's actually the right thing you have said but the stake is living by it. Truth to tell, Virtually everyone including the seductive ladies talked about by Chyke knows this but we must learn to pummel ourselves to make it work. Experience has shown that premarital sex in or out of courtship plays down on the eventual success of courtship. everyday in a clean courtship leaves both looking forward to another day cos there seem to be something interesting to wait for, but what will there be to wait for if sex has been taken off?
Good as it may sound, the two in a courtship must share the same values to make the wait worth it. Even as accepted as your position on this enny, dont forget that your stand and will-power can be easily undermined by a pretentious partner. U know that most ladies do not just know when to stop showing all those plenty affection and the pretentious guy only waits for that time and the virginity you talk about is history. u must pray hard. as for Chyke and the seducing ladies, i think no virgin lady will seduce a man. they become seducers as a result of a first experience which they may have been drawn into by men. But self-control is what they need. besides, let the man remember that premarital sex is bad and so avoid the advances of the seducing ladies. I rest my case.
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@eniola-op u are virgin with all dis ur contribution
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let him without sin cast the first stone ::) ::) ::) ::)
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U pple sound a littll too reserved cos sex will really depend on d kind of relationship u're into.
At times givin to sex make a relationship work for the beta & stronger so don't get it twisted.
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@ emuobolip, I simply agree with U. Self control is what all both committed couple need with the help of God. Virginity to me is never history, it God's plan up til tomorrow, so pls walk @ it.
@ brainzzxx, that was really inspiring?
@ rexine, good questn for enny.
@ annyjay, i dint post this topic to condemn anybody. NO MATTER YOUR MISTAKE OR SIN, GOD STILL FORGIVES. EVERY ONE IS A SINNER, ONLY GOD SAVES. That you made a mistake doesn't mean that's the real you. You can make it up and continue gloriously.
@ kasaboy, u're right when you say "it depends on the kind of relatnshp u're into. GOD'S context say 'IN MARRIAGE' between two partners, not just a fun thing for boys and girls, it's the consummation of a blood covenant, before the procreation and recreation aspect. I believe all have contributed well. God bless you all and take charge.
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In anyway u may want to look at it, pre-marital sex should be avoided.we may not see the consequences physically but it is always there if not now maybe in the lives of our children.it is a person decision and conviction. Some useful advice here romances7..com
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Very true @ finfreedom, I agree with you
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@ emuobolip that was cool, @ brainzzxxx thanks. @ rexine I'd answer your question honestly I'M ONE BY GOD'S GRACE. I'm not saying this to feel righteous or make others uncomfortable but to tell my fellow sister jobbers it is possible to be a virgin in this wicked generation, it takes determination and resolution in your heart with God's help. My fiance is a wonderful/God sent Man. I really appreciate him cos I've not seen a person so God-fearing like him. Let me stop here.
@ kasaboy, that's a wrong notion you're having, pls change it.
@ finfreedom, that was cool. One luv.
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We dont need tis kind of luv show here u can go n publich ur opinion in magazines.
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@ prince4lif are you jealous? Afterall this is open discussion... well, if you're offended, lol
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From the study of this topic it's obvious that there are no general rules for all relationships. What works for one may never work for the other. I've seen many made in heaven/church like relationship (eg christmatic weddings for our catholic brethren ie no courtship, no visiting, no nothing nothing till marriage) that didn't work and I've seen many one night stand/club girls relationships that have blossomed to full fledged successful marriages. It doesn't really matter. What is important is compatibility of the two in question. Once they agree on anything, and stick to it, then it would work. It's just that to be on the safe side, avoid it. But as i said it doesn't really work for all. Stay blessed everyone.
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@ Chineduace, I agree with you. For those who have made mistakes to me it's just a bend in the road, but once you're acquainted with the right pattern, you adjust. Like you said it's safe to avoid it, I say IT IS GOD'S INTENTION AND PLAN TO AVOID IT "EXCEPT IN MARRIAGE". Take charge and God bless ya all.
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@ Kasaboy, i rested my case earlier but i am tempted to react to ur claim. I suppose u r a 'happening and around' dude in a social sense from ur words, but to assume people are getting it twisted here is to be one-sided. dont u think so? Imagine a Hap's dude having sex with like 7 different ladies depending on 7 different kinds of relationship and never settles with any of these and yet u say sex sometimes make relationship strong? However it never made it strong in these 7 escapades? be true to urself, how many of ur exploits or do i say 'victims' do u now see as worth life partners? bro, sex in courtship is mundane and can never be right. God has set a standard which if ever circumvented will yeild calamity for humans. premarital sex is one such.
it is not to sound sanctimonious. I am as guilty as u may be but the truth is, i realise the magnitude of wrong it is and have since stayed off.
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@ emuobolip, You are simply MATURED, I EXPEDITIOUSLY AGREE WITH YOU.
@ Kasaboy, those questns emuobolip asked are very vital and essential questns any human on earth is supposed to answer. The question here is originality not counterfeit. God's set standards if broken will lead to CHAOS, ask those who have engaged in it. But the counterfeit has beclouded a lot. I GIVE IT UP TO YOU EMUOBOLIP. THAT WAS SOUND. God bless you bro. Take charge.
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@ emuobolip, that's Very Correct. Flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, keep on keeping On. One luv.
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SEXUAL INTERCOURSE IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP?
May God elp us at dis evning of earth.Are you blaming only men for dis act?
What about som ladies dat believ man doesnt LOVE/LIKE them bcos he refuses to be in btw there thighs? Or wat about if the man is an impotent?
God knos d best but you choose which way to go.
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@ tuumoxie, believe is not what matters but WHAT IS THE ORIGINAL PLAN, remember when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is INEVITABLE. God knows the best and HE has revealed and told us, so it's left for us to WORK IT OUT. one luv.
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@ emuobolip, bros abi madam! na watin I do 4 u?... U misintepreted all I said in my previous post. Most especially about sayin I'm d kind that hav relationship with 7 different women! Ofcourse u shld hv disern beta being d mature person that u are dat I mean a man to one single woman.
Don't be to quick to make such assumptions nxt time...afterall u sef no say u know holly pass.
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@ Kasaboy, no vex with emuobolip na, in jus dey talk in mind, dalu biko..........
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@ faith, did u just write that? Whatever happened to ur acclaimed understanding of what i wrote? this does not follow if u really understood.
@ kasaboy, u no do me anything jawe. I did not misinterprete u neither did i say u r d sort in 7 relationships. I only drew an illustration with that so i can bring up my points in those questions.besides, u merely claimed that sex could make relationships stronger. That is clear enuf not to be misinterpreted. So u can see that it is u who is misunderstanding me. Anyways, sowi if u feel bad. have so much fun. Cheerio?!
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;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D, @Faith Yetu is this your idea of a trick question? Like @annyjay said " let him without sin cast the first stone".
For the likes of @Eniola, we thank God for you, for keeping the oil burning, you shall be rewarded....no doubt. And for those of you like me who have lost it either pre or post..........be rest assured that you have loved, had sex and still having sex! If you have lost it and you are still single, ask for forgiveness, believe me when i say you that you are still a virgin! ???.......ha ha ha!!! Of course you are NOT! But then the sin has been forgiven you. Problem now is, for those of us who can testify, once you have eaten the sweet, mind-blowing forbidden fruit, its quite difficult ( not impossible though) to stop eating.
So in conclusion before i get carried away thinking about what @Eniola is missing and what some of us might be getting later on............. ::) :-[ ...........................i would like to say Sex is sweet! Its God's idea.....and a highly appreciated one at that! Its God given and permitted! It is heavenly! It is beautiful! Its a bang! It's....It's...... STRICTLY FOR HUSBANDS AND WIVES!!! A B S T A I N B4 MARRIAGE!!! ;)
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lets call a spade a spade,marriage is honorable with the bed undefiled,that's what the bible says,for the fact that God deals with us based on grace rather than our works does not mean that we should continue in sin that grace may abound. >:(
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I have dated a virgin lady for four years now and she is still a virgin. But plz we jobbers here have to take note of this few things about sex and God's view of it. Now we take it that once an unmarried man plunges into an unmarried lady for the first tym, she is deflowerd..right? And that is pre-marital sex..huh? Ok. We forgot that you and your holyboyfriend/fiancee may be involved in oral sex more and more often and eschewing medically getting deflowerd just to justify your act..huh? What would you call that..? Sex or Xes before marriage? What about sex or lost in the heart before marriage? Many physical virgins are spiritually rotten prostitutes...yes!! God's original plan for sex has been truncated by man's evil urge. Virginity is just a medical term and does not represent holiness nor chastity. My policy is: I will help you keep the virginity if you are one of them but won't border if you are not. TO BE CONTI......
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@ emuobolip, no vex, I was just tryn to pacify kasaboy. He felt very bad that's all.
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@ smarted1st, don't wash your dirty linens in public, if you read the previous posts I posted, u'l look before you leap.
@ mikbest, you are right, i simply agree with you.
@ gentlered, nice epistle. Oral sex to me is very disgusting especially for those in courtships, that's UNRULY. Wel, for your rest posts, there are thoughts that come into our minds/intellects everyday, it's your maturity that makes you take the good and refuse the bad. Virginity is GOD'S PLAN UP TIL TOMORROW, whether medical or spiritual or intellectual.
@ emuobolip, don't mind me once again, just trying to pacify @ kasaboy that's all. Take charge ya all.
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@ smarted1st, am not missing anything, because I'd still do and enjoy it when i get MARRIED. You are the one missing, PEACE, TRANQUILITY, YOUR EGO AND PRIDE all shattered on the bed of fornication in the name of the pleasure you described above, Like @ poster said, Pls DON'T WASH YOUR DIRTY LINENS IN PUBLIC, and please don't go about justifying your act, you should be ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. Thank God you later said and recognised it's within MARRIAGE. HE has forgiven u, but remember every injury leaves the scars there permanently to be remembered. You know SCARS DON'T WIPE OUT because of forgiveness.
@ gentlered and mikbest, You are great men. I appreciate you.
@ faith, our fellow jobbers are beginning to get pissed off by YOUR TOPIC. One love.
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Oh P...l...e...a...s...e ! ! !. @Faith Yetu and @Eniola, its amazing how judgemental you both are, yet professing so much spiritually. :o Honestly, both of you should get together, you seem like a very pretty couple. :D. With regards to my linen...........its mine whether dirty or clean. @Eniola aired her own linen and because you believe that its clean (a man is innocent until proven guilty), she was permitted to say she's a virgin , yet i say im not and all hell breaks loose.......I do believe the Bill on Freedom of Speech is still in the house (i stand corrected).
@all, like i said ''let he without sin cast the first stone". When both of you can confidently tell me you are without sin (not necessarily sexual), (as we all know sin is sin afterall, none white, none small!) then and only then can you come here and point accusing fingers. Until then............................ thank God we are living in the time of Grace!. Shikena!
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Nobody can deny the fact that consensual sex is pleasurable (whether b/4 or after marriage). But the fact remains that nobody i know has ever regreted having sex in marriage whereas some people who had sex before marriage ended up regreting it. So who is wiser, God or man?
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@ smartd1st, no one is JUDGING You, like I said earlier in my posts, EveryOne including myself was a SINNER, Only GOD'S GRACE SAVED US. So if you still feel like CASTING A STONE ON YOURSELF, THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM. I believe you read where @ Eny said she's bla bla about her fiance? I believe you're just revolting not because of freedom of speech, but because you know.... TO BE CONTINUED.....
@ Eny, this post is educative and interactive by nature. I dint bring it up to piss anyone off or feel/prove HOLIER THAN THOU.
@ Baps, I SIMPLY AGREE WITH YOU. Man will always be Stupid/foolish without God, and God's Foolishness will 1 trillion times be wiser than Mans'. Take charge all, God bless you.
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;D, pissed? sorry to burst your bubbles, I AM NOT THE LEAST BIT! Judging myself, dont need to, too many doing that on my behalf. Just for your info, I AM NOT JUST MARRIED, I AM JOYFULLY MARRIED! 8) Whether i sealed the deal a virgin or otherwise, thats no one business save my husbands'. ;D But because i am married doesnt make it right to for me or any one person to stay on his or her righteous white horse, and make circles around others. before we start presenting our cases, lets learn to examine issues from both sides of the coin. The log in my eye wont let me see the speck in yours......... or will it? ???