HE WON'T LET ME BE!

I have known this guy for ages(more than 10 yrs),we used to be neighbours when we were both teenagers.He wanted a relationship with me then,but i was too young to have a boyfriend then so we remained friends.We gained admission into higher institutions n lost contact for a little while,then the mobile phones came and we continued our friendship from where we stopped.And then in my final year in the university,he told me he still wanted me in his life.I still told him i wasn't interestred,i wasn't in a relationship anyway.I recently started work n he was an instrument to me getting the job as he helped to submit my CV to his co.

The problem is,i don't love this guy to have a relaitonship with him but i like him as a friend.i have told him this but he just won't hear of it.Am not a tall person,so i wouldn't like to be married to a man who is below average height(he's below av. height).Our reasoning isn't the same either.I can't tell him these reasons bcos i don't want to hurt him.He has sworn that it just has to be me.

AM CONFUSED BECAUSE HE IS PRESSURISING ME,AND I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO TO MAKE HIM LEAVE ME ALONE.WHAT CAN I DO.

why did you not resist his helping you.....my dear be careful ooooo....find a gentle way to lay him off or give him a chance and see what comes out of it...

PERSON WEY U NO LOVE, NO MARRY O. BUT, DID N'T YOU KNOW WHAT HE WAS AFTER WHEN YOU GAVE HIM YOUR CV TO SUBMIT IN HIS COY

call me and we can talk about this...
08077961610

If we are not in good terms with the crude oil,then we should also not think of being friends with the kerosine,petrol,LPG,diesel & the other derivatives.U never wanted a relationship then u should hv avoided that favour especially from the person in question.I am nt saying it doesnt exist but must conventional offers like that come with a tongue in the cheek. My suggestion is that u take the bull by the horn by telling him (point blank) whts in ur mind.Afterall,the chick that will become a cock is spotted from the very first day it is hatched. Best of luck.

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Originally Posted by monyep

call me and we can talk about this...
08077961610

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u be relationship consultant ??? ;D ;D why must she call u sef ??? Drop ur own widow's mite here 4 her jo :D :D :D

THE FACT THAT HE HELPED U SHOULDN'T BE A CRITERIA FOR U TO ACCEPT HIM. SEE U HAVE TOLD HIM U DON'T WANT AND HE STILL PESTERS U, JUST AVOID HIM, PERIOD.ABI MUST A BABE DATE A GUY JUST BECOS HE HELPED HER.HABA FOR MENS' FOLK.

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Originally Posted by jeanie

.HABA FOR MENS' FOLK.

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Na wetin come concern men for here na? The person being discussed about is not a man,cos if he was then he would have gotten the message. I nor fit climb, na ground dem for dey talk am o. Nor be when u don climb the tree finish.


Longtime jeanie

@felixodeli, i dey jare my broda.how things

@Bimlove
The truth is if this guy should leave you alone you will loose greatly.Secondly, there is no big deal about you.Thirdly you are about to send away some one very special .Honestly there is power in you when guys admire you,it gives you a sense of confidence and assurance.
What you will find difficult to comprehend, is ,when this same guy eventually date another lady more pretty than you,then you will know that likeness and love are both mirrage that can only be define by the person involved.
Bimlove know for sure that it is not only bcos the guy was short that you find it difficult to date him it goes more that.
However, if you really think the guy does not worth your onions(which i doubt), stop seeing him, don't pick his calls,resigned from the job he got for you ( if you can ,try to get another job since both of you are working in the same company), and stop calling him.
How i wish i could get the contact of the guy.I really pity the guy.What a nice guy !!!

One Luv
Jibowu

One luv

@Jeanie
MUST A BABE DATE A GUY JUST BECOS HE HELPED HER.HABA FOR MENS' FOLK.

If a lion refuses to see himself as a king, he would end up begging the female pig(Sow) for a relatioship.When a cloud turns black and shouted in thundrous voice with lighting we know that she will soon cry out rain.So are Womens' folk.

One Luv
Jibwou

@ JIBOWU, NOW U ARE ASKING THE BABE TO RESIGN COS SHE REFUSED DATING THE GUY AND JUST BECOS THE GUY GOT HER THE JOB.HMM, NOW U SEE WHAT I MEANT BY MEN'S FOLK BAH.SEE, THAT GOD USED THE GUY TO GET HER THAT JOB DOESN'T MEAN THAT SHE MUST DATE THE GUY.I SEE NO REASON WHY SHE SHOULD RESIGN,THE ONLY THING I WILL ADVISE SHE DO IS THIS, BUY SOMETHING SPECIAL, CALL THE GUY AND TELL HIM IN A WAY HE WILL UNDERSTAND WHY SHE CANNOT DATE HIM PERIOD, AFTERALL, THE GUY MAY HAVE GOTTEN HIS OWN JOB THRU SOMEONE TOO.SHE HAS NOTHING TO LOOSE IF THE GUY SHOULD LEAVE HER, SEE, JIBOWU, THE FACT REMAINS THAT SHE DOESN'T HAVE ANY IOTA OF LIKENESS LET ALONE LOVE FOR THIS GUY SO DON'T SAY SHE WILL GET JEALOUS IF THE GUY SHOULD START DATING SOMEONE ELSE,FOR CRYING OUT LOUD WHY SHOULD I GET JEALOUS IF I NEVER REALY LOVED THE GUY IN THE FIRST PLACE.

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Originally Posted by jeanie

@felixodeli, i dey jare my broda.how things?

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Things dey fine o,we dey try to try.

@jeanie&Jibowu,
I'm really beging to love your exchange,its turning me .....

@Bimlove,
As a lady,you should know how to talk him out of the desire/lust,tell him reasons why the relationship will not work,ask him if he wants you to be happy or miserable,ask him --- cm'on you know how we do it.
As per the job,if your liver/conscience permits you,abeg throway face and enjoy yourself,he's not the first and will not be the last guy to 'assist' a lady.

Just like Mariah Careh's song, that gone till its gone, that you don't know what you've got until its gone. You don't see that value in this young man now all because he still long after you. He is showing you all the care in the world, gut you are throwing it back to him. But you will see that hidden value which you seems not to acknowledge now when you see him in another relationship. You'll nearly cry your eyes out when you see his wedding invitation. But by then, it will be too later. My sister, before its too late, embrace the treasure that you have handy. Another thing is that it is easier for men to get ladies that loves them, but it is difficult for ladies to get men that will really love them. But in your own case, you happen to fall into the category of the few lucky ones. A word is enough for a wise.

I'll like to share this true life story with you maybe it maybe of help. I have a friend that was in love with a lady, he so much loved this lady that he expended all his copper allawee on this girl and the day that she released the bombshell that she can't marry the guy, my guy fell sick to the extent that he was admmitted. One of the major reasons she gave was that she was taller than the guy which was obvious. After my guy was able to get over the shock and moved on with live, he started a relationship with a lady who was equally taller than him. When it now became dawn on this young woman that it's getting late, she started looking for a way to entice this my guy, but we all adviced him not to allow her. She kept coming until when my guy wedded about three years ago and up till now, the lady in question who is in he thirties is not married yet. I pray that you will not offer your dinner for a meal for cat.

Some people are destined to be friends good friends and nothing more.
Height, complextion whatever is not whats holding her back. She just isnt attracted to him, no chemistry. Simple

ignore him, get on with your life. Date someone else you like and he will get use to it in time.
Guys, like someone once said marry a lady who is in love with you and not the opposite if you want a happy and peaceful home. Never one who feels indebted to you cos of one favour or the other. It will wear off o and she go waka.
God Bless
TBABY

@Jeanie
FOR CRYING OUT LOUD WHY SHOULD I GET JEALOUS IF I NEVER REALY LOVED THE GUY IN THE FIRST PLACE.

When Thousands of voices speak, the ears can always know which one belongs to a woman.
No wonder, the wisest man in the world(Solomon) said among thousands you will not find a single woman that is truely wise(We are not taking about smartness or intelligency).
Jeanie I really respect you, but the truth is " you don fall my hand".You are talking like a typical simple lady.


@TBABY
She just isnt attracted to him, no chemistry. Simple

Women, when would you people stop basing relationship on emotion
when would you learn that attraction is nothing but a feeling
The so call lies you tell each other about "CHEMISTRY' is nothing but an emotional reaction
You said something about Love
You mentioned something about DATE and LIKENESS
For ages souls of women across the globe have been entangled by what they believe to be love.Yet so many ladies base love on feeling, chemistry, emotion and thinking.Here lie the problems in our societies.She that have ears let her listen

One luv
Jibowu

@JIBOWU:-X :-X :-X :-X

My dear,i really think d final decison on this issue should be done by u becos,u alone know how u feel about this guy.i don't think height should be a criteria if u really know what u want.i think u should check out qualities such as God fearing,loving,faithful etc in a guy but above all,what ur feelings are.Have a thorough check on urself dear,so that u don't make a costly mistake.Remember the worst thing that can happen to any lady is to marry the wrong person.All d best

well mr Jibowu it seems you dont understand what love is yourself.
Love grows and it takes time. You just dont fall in love with people just cos they pay ur fees, help you get job and hang around you a lot. It has nothing to do with these things andtrue love cant be forced. dont gety me wrong oo you can love your gateman, driver, your father , mother but when it comes to ones partner i believe its much more deeper and that deeper love grows with time.

Something at first makes you wanna stick around someone. Some call it likeness i call it attraction. If its not there everything that person does will be repulsive. its complicated and its the way of women. Ever wondered why a lady would find a guy other says is fine, rich etc repulsive. Simple she isnt attracted to him.

My lovely TBABY,
It is true, women are complicated no wonder they find it difficult to know what they want.
Honestly, your idea about love is great
Love takes time to grow
love should be mutual
love should be devoid of sentiments
love endures
love is patient, kind and understanding
love will release her beloveth in time when the beloveth refuse to appreciate love
love will never force, rather she will give her beloveth choice to choose


TBABY let the truth be told
Ladies are very funny,and it is so bad that most of them discovered when it is too late.

Now am sooooo confused ::) ???

.....hmmm interesting contributions!

@Bimlove!
If you sincerely look inwards and still discover he doesn't posses the qualities you want from a man (physically and otherwise) then, there's no point!. I advice you stick to your guns!

However, still employ diplomatic means to get him to understand that you don't feel anything for him and moreover that you are in love with someone else! (That is if you are).

The bottom line here is "It takes Two to Tango". If he loves you dearly and you don't, it will all end in a fiasco!

Goodluck!

Have you ever heard of saying: When the wrong guy loves you right!

Sometimes the people we don't like makes the best of friends.

Bimlove your reasons for rejection are no issues what of if the so-called tall guys didn't treat you right?

Abey is high time you gave this guy a chance boo

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Originally Posted by Dagunro

.....hmmm interesting contributions!

@Bimlove!
If you sincerely look inwards and still discover he doesn't posses the qualities you want from a man (physically and otherwise) then, there's no point!. I advice you stick to your guns!

However, still employ diplomatic means to get him to understand that you don't feel anything for him and moreover that you are in love with someone else! (That is if you are).

The bottom line here is "It takes Two to Tango". If he loves you dearly and you don't, it will all end in a fiasco!

Goodluck!

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Now why do i find myself always lookin out for u n florafab's contributions?! I wonder.

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Originally Posted by bimlove

I have known this guy for ages(more than 10 yrs),we used to be neighbours when we were both teenagers.He wanted a relationship with me then,but i was too young to have a boyfriend then so we remained friends.We gained admission into higher institutions n lost contact for a little while,then the mobile phones came and we continued our friendship from where we stopped.And then in my final year in the university,he told me he still wanted me in his life.I still told him i wasn't interestred,i wasn't in a relationship anyway.I recently started work n he was an instrument to me getting the job as he helped to submit my CV to his co.

The problem is,i don't love this guy to have a relaitonship with him but i like him as a friend.i have told him this but he just won't hear of it.Am not a tall person,so i wouldn't like to be married to a man who is below average height(he's below av. height).Our reasoning isn't the same either.I can't tell him these reasons bcos i don't want to hurt him.He has sworn that it just has to be me.

AM CONFUSED BECAUSE HE IS PRESSURISING ME,AND I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO TO MAKE HIM LEAVE ME ALONE.WHAT CAN I DO.

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baby,I really need to know,if suddenly you discover this guy is worth N50,000000(FIFTY MILLION NAIRA),would u change your mind....probably got u thinkin there :-\
U need to look beyond physical attractions like height and looks and focus on attributes like his determination,willpower,strength of mind and character, and also his level of affection and respect for you.
I just want you to know that the fact that he is temporarily impecunious and struggling does not mean he will wallow in perpetual,abject poverty.
if you ask me....better a shortman that will love,provide and respect me,than an impoverished,good for nothing HUNK,who will be too busy with his looks and....abeg!!
just look well before you leap. :)